


Don’t Whine: Why Me? Go: Try Me

by BloodBornOleander



Series: Laying Beneath The Sun With Clouds Above My Head [2]
Category: Harry Potter - Fandom, Katekyo Hitman Reborn!
Genre: I Will Go Down With This Ship, M/M, Multi, Order of the Phoenix - Freeform, Please read, Reborn x Skull, Sequel, after this disaster that is us, how the hell do i tag, still don’t know how to tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-25
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2020-10-27 19:44:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 12,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20765930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BloodBornOleander/pseuds/BloodBornOleander
Summary: The sequel to This Disaster That is Us! Set in the fifth book of Harry Potter! Set after Katekyo Hitman Reborn ends!Disclaimer: neither Harry Potter nor Katekyo Hitman Reborn belongs to me... if it did, there’d be a lot more yaoi.[Indefinite Hiatus]





	1. Hello again, old friend

“I’d prefer it if you didn’t tell Sirius,” Skull said quietly as he and Remus leaned against the wall.

”Why?” the werewolf asked. “He’ll be delighted to see you. A bit mad, sure, but delighted.”

Skull shook his head, sipping his drink quietly.

”We’ve got enough on our plate already. You guys- he -has got enough on his plate already,” Skull said. “I’ll tell him. I really will. But not until all this blows over. You know how he’ll react if he realises it’s me.”

”...overprotectiveness and his mind will be distracted,” Remus said, and Skull nodded.

”Precisely. Can you keep a secret, Remus?”

”...fine. But promise you’ll tell him. Promise.”

”I promise,” Skull said, cradling the warm cup in his hands gently. He smiled at Remus. “So, wanna meet my boyfriend?”

Remus choked on his spit and stared incredulously at Skull, then he gave a bark of laughter and ruffled Skull’s hair.

”Its good to see that you’ve moved on.”

Skull blinked, looking at Remus, and then smiling sadly.

”Well, I’ve spent enough time moping for the last few decades. I think it’s time to move on,” he said. “So? Wanna meet him?”

”Are you talking about me?” Reborn asked, poking his head through the door. Skull laughed.

”Narcissistic much?” Skull asked as Reborn joined the two of them. Reborn shrugged, slinging an arm around Skull’s shoulders.

”I’m one of the world’s greatest,” Reborn said coolly. “Women and men alike used to throw themselves at my feet begging for my attention. Although,” Reborn nosed Skull’s neck, “none of them can compare to you, Bellissimo. I have an excuse to be narcissistic.”

Skull turned red, swatting at Reborn’s arm in embarrassment. Then he turned to Remus, still flushed red.

”Remus, this is Renato Sinclair. He was introduced as Reborn. Ren, this is Remus. One of my childhood friends,” Skull introduced. Remus and Reborn shook hands, sizing each other up. There was a tense silence, and Skull squirmed. “I’ll... go get us a drink,” he said and hurried away.”

Remus and Reborn watched him go, then Remus’s eyes snapped to Reborn, and he smiled creepily.

”...so, you’re Reborn,” Remus said.

”And you’re Remus Lupin,” Reborn answered back. Remus’s forced smile fell away and he glared at the Sun.

”Listen,” he said threateningly. “If you even _think _about cheating or breaking Rigel’s-”

”I never would!” Reborn snarled, his eyes flashing yellow for a split second. “Skull is different from others. I love him. He loves me. If I ever break his heart, I’ll kill myself.”

Remus looked taken aback. He studied Reborn carefully, smelling the indignation and anger rolling off the man in waves. Remus sighed, nodding.

”Fine,” he said curtly. “But I’m not the only one watching out for him.”

Reborn snorted.

”And you’re not the most dangerous. Viper would drain my bank dry before spilling everything about me. Fon would most likely cause a bloodbath. Verde would strap me to a table and dissect me. Lal and Colonello would most likely use me as a living target. My idiot students would try kill me. A couple of wizards don’t scare me,” he said. Remus blinked. Just what... had Rigel got himself into in the past few decades...?

”Hey! I’m back! ...? Why is the atmosphere here so much awkwarder than before?” Skull asked. Reborn shot him a smile, stealing a quick kiss.

”Nothing you should worry about, la mia nuvola,” he purred. Skull shot him a dubious looks, but nodded anyway.

Remus suddenly had a feeling that all the single dogs in the Order would be quite annoyed at the couple’s doting.

...would they be able to sleep at night...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters will get longer!


	2. Of dementors and muggles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dementors. Harry. Muggles. Fon. Reborn. Skull. Mr. Weasley. Utter disaster.

“So this is where the boy lives?” Fon asked, looking around. “It’s quite... neat.”

”Mm,” Skull said, nodding. “The whole village is like this. Hates people... different, from what I’ve heard.”

Reborn raised an eyebrow.

”Isn’t that the brat?” he asked, nodding towards a figure sitting on a swing gloomily. Mr. Weasley squinted, and then brightened, nodding.

”Indeed! Come on then you lot!” he said, hurrying over to the boy. “Harry!”

Fon hummed, raising an eyebrow.

”Well, he’s rather... enthusiastic,” the martial artist said. Skull shrugged.

”Let’s go,” Reborn sighed and the three trailed after Mr. Weasley.

The two were already talking when they arrived, and Harry looked rather surprised to see his sort of teacher’s and their friend in front of him. Skull raised a hand in greeting, grinning stupidly.

”Hey! How are you, kiddo?” he asked cheerfully, and Harry nodded dumbly.

”Chaos,” Reborn said smoothly, and Fon bowed towards Harry.

”I believe we met at your school,” Fon said lightly, smiling gently. “My name is Fon.”

”Uh, Harry Potter,” Harry said, greeting the man nervously. “Mr. Weasley... everyone... what are you doing here?”

”We came to pick you up, obviously!” Skull said, rolling his eyes and puffing out his cheeks. “Tsuna- that’s Renato’s student, an adorable little midget -had a bad feeling and told us to pick you up ASAP! Good thing his Intuition works halfway across the world, eh?”

”That’s my student,” Reborn said rather proudly/smugly. Fon smiled a rather strained smile.

”Yes... Mr. Weasley is here because he knew where you lived. Skull just wanted to go along, and Reborn came along under the excuse of keeping an eye on Skull,” Fon said, and then let out an aggrieved sigh. “The others nominated me to keep an eye on both of them.”

Mr. Weasley bounced on the balls of his feet. Looking around anxiously.

”Yes, well, we’d best be off now-”

Suddenly everything felt insanely cold and there was a scream and everyone jolted up. Harry began to shiver.

”...dementors...” he said. “And... quite possibly Dudley judging from that scream.”

”...we... should go save him...” Skull sighed, and Mr. Weasley nodded, bounding off towards the scream. Everyone else glanced at each other, before following him reluctantly.

When they arrived, Mr. Weasley was warding off two dementors with his weasel shaped patronus; and Skull cursed, whipping out his wand and remembering that first kiss he’d shared with Reborn- when he’d laughed with his Family and friends, his first motorbike and- “EXPECTO PATRONUM!”

A blue of silver shot from his wand, too fast for anyone to make out, and the two dementors fled quickly. Mr. Weasley gave a sigh of relief and nodded towards Skull, smiling shakily.

”Thanks... I was running out of good memories,” he said and Skull nodded wordlessly, then nudged a fat lump on the ground with his foot.

”...is this your cousin?” Skull asked Harry and Harry nodded, scowling.

”Yea, yea that’d Dudley.”

Skull frowned.

”Guess we’d better get him back then. And tell your guardians you’ll be coming with us. Who’s carrying this lump?”

”You have magic,” Reborn sat flatly. “Use it.”

Skull rolled his eyes and nodded, and the group quickly made their way towards Harry’s house, led by the boy himself.

To say that Mr and Mrs Dursley were angry and shocked was an understatement. When they saw the state of Dudley they were _livid. _Then they noted how Skull was dressed, and they practically blew their tops, before practically pulling the lot in before the neighbours noticed.

Skull looked at Harry grimly as the two parents started a screaming fit.

”Go get your stuff,” the stuntman said to him. “This should be over soon if Reborn has anything to say about it.”

Harry nodded and went up the stairs two at a time. He deliberately slowed down his packing, listening to the shouting match, until there was a sharp, loud, _bang_! And Harry new Reborn had reached the end of his temper.

There were a few muffled words Harry couldn’t quite catch, before Fon appeared at his door, looking rather worn out.

”...are you alright...?” Harry asked carefully, and Fon nodded.

”Got everything you need?” the man asked, and Harry nodded, pointing at his trunk and Hedwig’s cage.

”Yea, that’s all,” Harry said. Fon nodded and walked over to his trunk and the cage. Harry hesitated. “Uh, Mr. Weasley can probably get that. It’s actually kinda heav... oh.”

Fon, despite his rather slender figure, had picked up both the trunk and cage with practised ease and began to walk towards the door. Harry gaped as the Chinese man turned around.

”Are you coming?” he asked and Harry raced after him.

The Dursley Family were all knocked out on the floor and Harry felt a sense of glee from this. Skull looked at Harry in amusement, and held out a hand.

”Come on. We’re apparating there,” he said.

”Where?” Harry asked, and Skull winked.

”You’ll see.”

Harry took Skull’s hand, (Reborn had Skull’s other hand. Mr. Weasley had Fon and the luggage), and there was a sharp pop as they apparated. They arrived in a dim neighbourhood and Harry looked around, rather confused.

”Where...?” he asked again. Mr. Weasley handed him a slip of paper.

”Read this.”

Harry did as told. As soon as he’d finished reading, the ground started to rumble, and then, a building that hadn’t been there stood before him and Harry gaped as he was led into the building. Skull laughed, ruffling his hair.

”Your godfather is in the kitchen. Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this was a bit rushed. I had a time limit because of my stupid twin brother. I’m relate by the way.


	3. The meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yea... stuff... please just read...

Skull looked up as he heard Harry shouting. None of he wizards seemed to notice, but his friends all glanced up as well. Skull got up from his seat with a small smile.

”I gotta do something real quick, be back soon,” he said. No one argued and he bounded up the stairs quickly. Harry was still shouting when Skull arrived, Hermione looked ready to cry and Ron looked guilty.

Skull grabbed Harry’s shoulder and the boy whipped around, ready to fight. Then he deflated as he saw it was Skull. The stuntman raised an eyebrow at the three of them. Then he stared at Harry disapprovingly.

”Fightings not the only way to solve your issues, you know,” Skull said. “No matter what a lot of people tend to think.”

”Professor Skull!” Ron said. “What are you doing here!?”

Skull laughed.

”Ah, right, I suppose you haven’t seen me around, what with me and my Family disappearing as soon as the meetings finish.”

”Are you part of the Order too, Professor?” Hermione asked curiously.

”Yup,” Skull said. “Along with my Family. You’ll meet them soon. And George, Fred, those ears wont work. Why don’t you come down?”

There was a bustle, and then a crack as the Weasley twins appeared, grinning mischievously.

”Hello Professor Skull,” they said at the same time.

”Just Skull is fine.”

Ginny Weasley’s head popped out too, then she saw Skull.

”Oh, hello Professor,” she said, much to Skull’s chagrin. Then Mrs. Weasley appeared. She looked tired, but she mustered a smile.

”The meetings over,” she said. “You can come down to have dinner now. Everyone’s dying to see you, Harry. And Skull, please reign in your friends.”

Skull laughed unabashedly and walked down the stairs with the children and Mrs. Weasley. As they entered the kitchen, they saw the Order still hissing at each other and five oddly dressed muggles looking very annoyed. Then when the kids came in, they all shut up and several people started to get up and leave.

Harry spotted several familiar, faces and then beamed when he saw Sirius. The older man beamed to when he saw his godchild.

”Harry!” the man laughed. “Good to see you!”

”Sirius!” Harry cried, hugging his godfather tightly. Skull watched with pained eyes, and he turned away towards his Family, who all looked at him rather sadly. He gave them a grin, then noticed that the Weasley children were all looking rather curiously at his Family. He chuckled, waving them over. They came over hesitantly.

”Kids, you’ve met Reborn,” Skull said, waving a hand at his boyfriend, who dipped his hat with a ‘chaos’ for greeting. “This is Fon. That’s Viper, Verde, and Colonello.”

”Yes, well,” Mrs. Weasley interrupted. “If the lot of you want dinner before midnight, I’ll need a hand. No, Harry, stay where you are, you’ve had a long journey.”

Colonello stretched and nodded towards Mrs. Weasley.

”Well, we’d best be off then,” he said. Mr. Weasley frowned.

”You’re not staying this time either? You realise you’re definition of ‘soon’ is rather different to mine,” he said jokingly. Fon smiled apologetically.

”We apologise, but we really don’t want to be a burden. Besides, we have a few things that need to be... taken care of, back at the mansion,” he said. Sirius frowned at this, looking over from where he was chatting with Harry.

”Mansion? Why’s this never been mentioned before? Surely there would be a lot better than... well... _here_,” he said, waving a hand.

”...the Acrobaleno Mansion,” Verde said after a long pause, “is rather... dangerous. Sometimes there are frequent... _accidents_.”

There was silence. Then Skull forced a laugh and clapped twice.

”Enough of this oppressing mood, you people! Lighten up! Surely we can stay for just tonight. Lal won’t mind.”

”Indeed she won’t,” Reborn said, holding up his phone. “It appears she’s in a bad mood and doesn’t want us around. She’s taking her stress out on some poor soldiers.”

”That’s settled then!” Skull said. “We’ll stay for today. And we do have some news to tell Sirius, don’t we, you guys?”

Viper scowled.

”We’re setting him go already?” he- she? -asked.

”I think he’s been tortured enough already,” Skull said drily. “We need him sane to answer questions.”

”Who are you lot talking about? Torture who?” Bill asked.

”Why, Peter Pettigrew of course!” Skull said happily. There was second of silence, and then a loud “_what?!_”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow... this is short... meh.


	4. Hogwarts again! Verde... why are you here...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Verde is going to be a teacher at Hogwarts?! Oh the poor students...

“Oh my God,” Skull said flatly. “Oh my God. Are you insane?”

Dumbledore frowned.

”I think not...”

”You want _him_,” Skull gestured towards Verde. “To be a teacher at Hogwarts. For a new subject. Of Muggle Medicines. You’re insane.”

”I’m not that bad,” Verde said. Skull fixed him with a dubious look.

”...the first tine you saw Sirius transform you tried to dissect him. When you saw people doing magic, you grabbed their wands and almost broke it. What the hell do you mean by ‘not that bad’?” Skull demanded.

Verde shrugged uncaringly and Skull looked at Reborn imploringly.

”Ren, tell Dumbledore it’s a horrible idea, and tell Verde not to be a smug bastard,” he begged. Reborn hummed, glancing at Verde and raising his gun.

”Verde, don’t be a smug bastard,” Reborn parroted coolly. “And old man, you’re insane.”

Dumbledore sighed, rubbing his temples tiredly.

”Then what else can I do?” he questioned. “I need as many guards as possible without alerting the ministry. You said so yourself, Skull.”

”Mhm,” Skull said, frowning. “I know. Shush. I’m trying to think. Verde, think of something.”

”If you want me to be honest, sending me is the best choice,” Verde said and Skull groaned, collapsing against Reborn in mock despair. “If what you say is true, and Muggle Medicines isn’t a new thing, and can be reapplied to the curriculum, then I’m the best you can get. The others all only know basic first aid and Reborn...”

Everyone in the room glanced at the hitman who looked at them all innocently. Skull sighed. Verde looked at the hitman, who raised an eyebrow. Verde sighed. “He’s too goddamn ass backward aNd you all full well know that.”

Skull groaned.

”Fine,” he grouched. “But no one else is coming along. The students need at least _some_ of their sanity.”

** _ HOGWARTS, HERE WE ARE! AGAIN... _ **

“Hey,” isn’t that Verde or something?” Ron whispered to Harry as the feast started. The boy who lived craned his head to stare at the green haired man sitting at the Teacher’s table.

”What’s he doing here?” Harry asked. Ron shrugged.

”Dunno mate. Look, there’s Skull and Reborn. Who’s the pink toad?”

Harry shrugged.

** _ WITH THE THREE EX-ACROBALENO... _ **

“_No,_” Skull groaned, his head hitting the table. “For the sake of- this is why I didn’t want you coming along!”

”Because you knew he’s want to experiment on them?” Reborn asked, cutting himself a bit of steak. “Yes, very good observation.”

Skull gave his boyfriend a half-hearted glare, and Verde sighed.

”What about the inactive Storm over there? He looks rude.”

”_No_.”

”The Rain there?”

“_No_.”

“The Lightning over there?”

”_For the sake of-_ that’s Hagrid! He’s a teacher here!”

”He can’t be fully human.”

Skull turned to look at Reborn imploringly, and the hitman patted his purple hair.

”Just give him something. Just tell him not to kill anyone, or cause too much harm,” Reborn said and Skull glared.

”Renato! Who the hell would I hate so much to subject them to- oh. Oh. Wait a second,” Skull said, blinking once, then twice. He turned to Verde, his face blank of all emotion.

”Verde,” he said, his voice oddly high pitched. The scientist looked at him warily.

”...yes?” he asked carefully. Skull nodded discreetly at a large pink... blob sitting at the other end of the table.

”Do you see that woman there?” he asked, and Verde squinted, then gave a soft ‘ahh’.

”Ah, it was a woman. Not a toad,” he murmured softly. Skull gave a sharp smile.

”You can experiment on her all you want.”

”Excellent,” Verde drawled. “I’d like to figure out how she manages to look like that, and why exactly she thinks that much pink looks good.”

Skull smiled happily, patting Verde’s hand and humming to himself. Reborn looked at him.

”An old friend?” he asked amusedly.

”Hm? Oh, oh, sort of,” Skull said, waving a hand. “Can you pass me the chicken please?”


	5. First lesson with Verde...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is screwed.

“Right,” Verde said crisply as he entered the classroom. “I’m Verde. While this class is called Muggle Medicines, we’ll be looking at all aspects of ‘medicine’. Such as science, the human body, maths and so on. If you don’t like it, I can always make you into an experiment and show you off to everyone else.”

”Verde...” Skull hissed softly, and the scientist let out an aggrieved sigh.

”Fine. Not an experiment, but I might dissect you.”

”Verde!”

”Not a dissection. Maybe make you dissect someone else then.”

”VERDE!”

Verde looked irritated.

”Fine!” he snapped. “Just a normal detention cleaning something. Happy?!”

”Very,” Skull said, nodding. He turned to the class. “Just... just don’t do anything stupid around him,” he said. “I’ll tell you if you go a little... overboard and he’s about to kill you. But for both your and my sake, just keep silent unless talked to and don’t act stupid.”

Everyone nodded in terror. Verde glared at Skull, who sat near the classroom door. Reborn was god knows where doing only god knows what. “Ok, Verde. Do your thing.”

”Yes,” Verde said sarcastically. “Thank you very much for your permission, Skull.”

Then he learned his throat and glared at all the students, who sat pale faced. Another insane muggle as a teacher... would they ever catch a break?”

”Who among you fools have been born from _muggles_?” Verde questioned, and about three hands went up. “Then how many of you have one parent who’s a muggle?” A few more hands went up. “Good. Then how many of you know about science?”

Hermione and there other hands went up. Verde sighed, looking annoyed. He turned to the chalk board and began to talk.

”Science: is the intellectual and practical activity encompassing the systematic study of the structure and behaviour of the physical and natural world through observation and experiment,” he said. “Write that down. However, to put it down simply for you idiots: science is the explanation of worldly phenomenons.”

More than one person looked confused and insulted. Except Hermione. She was soaking in every word Verde was saying. Verde continued to talk.

”Let’s talk your way. We’ll get to the medicine part later. We’ll do the basics first. Does anyone know how a rainbow is made?”

Skull gave a small snort, but hastily covered it up when Verde gave him a sharp glare, his glasses flashing ominously. Hermione’s hand bolted up before anyone else and Verde nodded towards her.

”A rainbow is a meteorological phenomenon that is caused by reflection, refraction and dispersion of light in water droplets resulting in a spectrum of light appearing in the sky. It takes the form of a multicoloured circular arc. Rainbows caused by sunlight always appear in the section of sky directly opposite the sun,” she said in a rush. Verde looked rather impressed, which Skull gaped at.

“Good,” Verde said. “Perhaps at least one of isn’t as stupid as the rest of you.”

There were indignant cries, but Hermione flushed at the praise. Heck, even Skull was impressed she’d managed to fish a praise from Verde of all people. Well... she did manage to recite a whole dictionary or something...

Verde was talking again.

”That, you idiots, is science. Now, we’ll scratch medicines for today and delve into it later. Medicine for muggles and medicine for witches is... different to say the least...”

Seamus and Dean, it seemed however, we’re getting bored. They had begun to crumple up papers, or turn them into paper planes and aiming them at Verde. Skull saw them, but let them continue. After all, better to sacrifice two and show others what the consequences would be...

The projectiles were thrown. Verde, although he may not be as fit or combative as other mafioso, was still mafioso. There was a brief flash of green, too fast for anyone but Skull to see, and the paper burst into flames. Verde turned around slowly, his gaze fixing onto Dean and Seamus who still had their arms raised.

”Right,” the scientist said calmly. “You two will be joining me for detention. Maybe I’ll get you to feed my test subjects. That should shock some sense into you. Any objections, Skull?”

”No,” the stuntman sighed, much to the two boys horror. “Do as you wish. Just don’t kill or maim them.”

”Hm...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOL. I literally just copy pasted the meaning of ‘science’. And I didn’t even understand it.


	6. DADA with Umbridge [Part One]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Umbitch, Reborn, and chaos. Also Cedric.

Reborn watched from the shadows as the break bell rung. Students streamed out and into the sunlight. Reborn saw Harry, Hermione and Ron walk. He scratched Leon’s chin and hummed to himself as Cedric Diggory ran up to the three friends.

Reborn took this as his time. He walked stealthily up to the four. Slipping between students and weaving through the shadows like the hitman he was. He stood behind Cedric, and it was almost a minute later that the trio noticed him as they talked.

”-it’s fine, Cedric. I couldn’t- Professor Reborn!” Harry yelped. Cedric whipped around, giving a small cry.

”Since when were you there?!” Ron cried.

”Manners Ron!” Hermione hissed, and Reborn shrugged.

”No need, Miss Granger. As for your question, Weasley, I was here since Diggory started thanking Potter,” Reborn said coolly.

”Oh,” Ron said. “Hey, what’s wrong with that friend of yours? Ya know, the one with green hair. Professor Verde.”

”What do you mean?” Reborn asked amusedly. Harry and Ron exchanged glances and Hermione glared at Ron for his rudeness. Cedric looked between them all hesitantly.

”Well, I mean-” Ron began to say, when Reborn interrupted.

”There’s so many things wrong with Verde, that you have to be more specific. Truth to be told, I’m amazed you haven’t noticed. Skull, Verde, myself, the others you saw- we’re all a bit strange in the head,” he said. The students gaped at him, and Reborn smirked. “But then again, wouldn’t you be a bit strange if you were cursed for 30 years?”

Everyone gaped at him as he walked away, and Harry shook himself out of it quickly. He raced after the hitman.

”Wait! Professor! Please, Professor!”

Reborn turned, raising an eyebrow. Harry caught up, panting. “You and Skull- you keep mentioning a curse, just what-”

”-exactly do we mean?” Reborn asked, and Harry nodded sheepishly. Reborn stared at him for a second, and Harry squirmed under the scrutinising look. Finally Reborn turned and began to walk away. However, he said over his shoulder, “All you need to know, brat, is that there are far, _far_ worse things out there than a lunatic who wants immortality. Understood?”

Harry nodded, but Reborn ignored him and seemed to vanish into the shadows. As Reborn walked through the corridors, Skull got off the pillar he’d been leaning against and raised an eyebrow.

”Really?” he asked. “Causing chaos first day back?”

”What can I say,” Reborn hummed. “It’s fun.”

Skull laughed, shrugging. Then he said, “I have a feeling I’ve been getting more lenient with you. I wonder why that is?”

”Because you love me, Bellissimo,” Reborn purred, blowing hot air towards Skull’s ear.

The stuntman flushed red, and began to walk away quickly.

”Fuck yea, and you’re lucky I do. Now remember to keep an eye on those four. Trouble always seems to find them in the end no matter what we try...”

Reborn nodded.

”Verde?”

”Eh, somewhere in his new labs. Or maybe testing out the school stairs.”

”Mhm. Then, about the little negotiation we had this morning...”

”...SHUT UP YOU BASTARD!”

”How cute, you’re all red, Bellissimo...”

** _ LESSONS WITH UMBITCH... _ **

“Wands away and quills out please,” Umbridge said and already Reborn was disliking the woman. For one, she has on far too much pink; in his opinion purple was much better. She was much to fat, a fact emphasised with the tight dress she wore. His Bellissimo was much better, with his slight curves and skin-tight motorcycle suit only he could pull off. Another, her voice was very grating; not like his Skull’s that he could listen to moaning all day long and- wait. Stop. No.

He was supposed to be concentrating. Not going off into wonderland. Reborn watched with boredom as the woman began her job. Except...

”Turn to and read chapter one: basics for beginners. There will be no need to talk.”

...textbook learning? Really? Wasn’t this a magic school? Maybe things would get more interesting later...

However, several minutes later, the students were still reading, and Reborn sat up with a frown. Then he noticed Hermione sitting up with her hand. Umbridge glanced at the girl, but pretended not to see her and ignored her. Reborn”s dislike of the woman grew and he coughed into his fist.

”Excuse me, Professor Umbridge, was it?” he asked it that velvety voice of his. Umbridge looked up, rather flustered, it seemed.

”Yes, yes it is,” she said. Reborn quirked an eyebrow and nodded towards Hermione’s direction. Everyone was looking at Hermione now.

”You have noticed the pretty girl near the middle, Miss Granger, has had her hand up for quite a while now?” he asked. Hermione flushed red, and several girls glared in jealousy. Who wouldn’t want to be complimented by the hot, badass Italian teacher? Umbridge hesitated.

”Well I, hadn’t noticed, actually,” she said haltingly, then turned to Hermione.

”You’re name, Miss...?”

”Granger,” Hermione said quickly, shooting a quick nod of thanks to Reborn.

”Yes, did you have a question about the text, dear...?”

”No, actually,” Hermione said. “I was actually going to ask about the course aims.”

”Well, I think that’s rather clear up on the board, dearie-”

”No, it isn’t,” Hermione said bluntly and Reborn nodded in respect for the girl. “There’s nothing up there about using defensive spells.”

”Using defensive spells?” Umbridge repeated. “Why, I can't imagine any situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely aren't expecting to be attacked during class?”

”We’re not going to use magic?” Ron asked loudly and Reborn smirked like the devil himself. _Now_ things were getting interesting...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the rather late update you guys! I got back from holidays, then promptly fell asleep from exhaustion. Then it was my birthday on Sunday, so yay! And then it was school and we were immediately given several tests to study for... Wuwuwu...


	7. DADA with Umbridge [Part Two]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part two of the previous chapter

“Wizards that are much older and cleverer than you have devised our new programme of study. You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way-” Umbridge began to say in a far too sweet voice for Reborn’s liking.

”What use is that?” protested Harry loudly. “If we're going to be attacked, it won't be in a-”

”Hand, Mr Potter!” sang Professor Umbridge and Reborn rolled his eyes. Maybe he should step in now...? Reborn decided not to when even more hands shot up into the air. Then Reborn watched in amusement and the smallest bit of irritation at the pink toad when-

“Mr. Potter you have already lost your house ten points do not make matters worse for yourself,” snapped Professor Umbridge. “As I was saying, you have been informed that a certain Dark wizard is at large once again. This is a lie-”

And Reborn’s bloodlust rose to a new degree. The entire room’s temperature seemed to go down several degrees and everyone stiffened. All eyes looked towards the only one who could do something so frightening.

Reborn’s onyx eyes had a sharp, dangerous edge to them. While his posture was relaxed, he played with a green gun the entire class- sans Umbridge -knew as Leon. Reborn gave Umbridge a sharp smile.

”So what you’re saying,” the hitman purred softly, “is that my Bellissimo and myself are liars.”

Umbridge shook visibly.

”I- I don’t know what you mean, Mr. Reborn,” she said.

”’You have been informed that a certain Dark Lord is at large once again’,” Reborn said. “‘This is a lie’. That is what you said, no?”

”Y-yes, but I don’t see what this has to do-”

”It is simple, Ma’am,” Reborn said, getting up from his seat and slinking over to the fat woman. He towered over her, his fedora casting dark shadows over his glowing yellow eyes. “Skull and myself were there when this... Voldemort... this so called ‘Dark Lord’ that you all fear so much... rose from the dead-”

”Y-you-!” Umbridge screeched. “How dare you!”

Reborn talked over her. He didn’t raise his voice, but it echoed through the class ominously; promising pain, destruction and chaos to all those who opposed him.

”Furthermore, I killed those so called ‘Death Eaters’. Me, a mere... _muggle_ as you people call people like me,” a Reborn said, and there was a sharp intake of breath at this. “And you know what? They really weren’t anything much. They were just like anyone else. Just a sack of meat and bones and blood. They crumpled when I put a bullet through their head. They fell when Skull took their heads. And that powerful Dark Lord? He _fled_. You weren’t here last year, Umbridge, when I said it. So I’ll say it once again.

”This Voldemort character... he’s not someone you should be scared of. I’ve seen and faced far more powerful, far more dangerous people in my life. And you... you’re a _teacher_. Isn’t it your _job_ to listen to and help students instead of giving them detention and calling them liars? You’re pathetic,” Reborn hisses. Umbridge trembled in fury as he continued on. “Ten points to Potter for speaking on what he thought was right. Five points to all others who spoke up. And _don’t try to do anything else_, Umbridge. I will not be as lenient as this time. I may not be a full time teacher here, but I’m still a _assistant_ teacher. Adding to that, I just may be the scariest thing you’ll see in your entire _life_.

”Voldemort? Not that scary once you strip away his wand. His followers? Just a much of mindless fools. However, I’m not denying he’s back- because he _is_ back. And if you narrow minded fools can’t see what’s true and what’s false even if it hits you upside the head, well, you won’t just be dealing with little old Voldemort. You’ll be dealing with _me_.”

A hand landed on Reborn’s shoulder and the hitman swung around, his eyes glowing yellow. Verde looked back at him, unimpressed.

”Control your temper, Reborn,” Verde said. “Omertà still stands.”

Reborn sneered, but he swept out of the classroom, his eyes going back to black. The scientist glanced at the quivering pink toad. He snorted, shaking his head.

”Are you naturally this stupid?” he questioned, “or do you have to put in effort? Because you’re doing exceptionally well at antagonising Reborn.”

”Professor Verde!” Umbridge squeaked indignantly. “I’ll have you leave my classroom at once!”

Verde scowled at her, his sharp eyes scrutinising her behind his glasses. Then he snorted.

”You spit in the face of evolution,” he told her. Verde gave a mock sigh, pushing up his glasses. “I really can’t figure out how you were born this way. If only your mother had swallowed you instead...”

Then he too swept out the room, leaving Umbridge spluttering, and his lab coat fluttering behind him.

”Damn,” someone whispered at the back. “Who knew Professor Verde could be so good at roasting people?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I have a challenge for you guys! Of course, there’s a reward too! The first person to guess this riddle:
> 
> What is seen in the middle of March and April that can’t be seen at the beginning or end of either month?
> 
> will get to ask a prompt from me! Toodle-doo!
> 
> On a completely different note... I was rewatching KHR and... well, realised once again how epic Hibari is. Like, he had numerous broken bones and then got up to fight again. The Death Heather poison he was just like ‘meh. Nah. Won’t work’. Like... holy fuck. He good.


	8. Extra!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For the one who guessed the riddle: rozielrie!  
Who gave the prompt ‘deaged Harry!’ This isn’t really dealing but... well, he’s a baby so... meh.  
Hope this is up to your standards!

Ok, maybe Skull should have been worried when Verde barged into the dining room, of Grimmauld Place, dragging Byakuran behind him. Byakuran somehow managed to look rather worried, guilty, excited, triumphant and sly all at once. Verde looked... smug. Okay. Skull should have been very worried, but in his defence he hadn’t known what Verde had done.

...okay, maybe the bright, neon yellow (what the fuck was _with_ that colour choice?!) bazooka had been a big clue. But it hadn’t been the Ten Year Bazooka, so Skull made the mistake of relaxing. Yea... with Verde and Byakuran around? Not exactly the best choice he’d made in his life...

”I’ve done it!” Verde cried triumphantly. “I’ve created a way for people to travel between different dimensions!”

”With my help,” Byakuran interrupted, and Verde shrugged.

”A little.”

There was silence, broken by Skull’s “say what now?”

Verde gave a sigh, like he was bemoaning Skull’s low IQ level. He aimed the bazooka randomly and everyone who knew what it was tensed.

”I’ll just show you,” Verde said. The Acrobaleno’s (sans Reborn, because chaos) eyes widened in alarm.

”No- wait!”

There was a bang! and Harry Potter disappeared in a puff of sparkles.... only to be replaced with a small, red headed four year old child. Everyone gaped as Harry- not Harry- Harry? looked around in confusion. He opened his mouth.

”Mommy? What happened?” he asked.

”Oh my God,” Sirius muttered. “It’s a mini Lily.”

At this, the child’s emerald green eyes brightened.

”Sirius!” he cried out and toddled over to the man, who looked stunned. “Up! Up! Where Mommy? Are we playing a game? I don’t wanna play. Let’s play hide and seek instead!”

”Is that... Harry?” Mr. Weasley asked in shock. “But he’s... a child! And his hair is red!”

”Oh my God,” Lal said, her face blank. “Verde... please don’t tell me you swapped our world’s Harry for another world’s Harry.”

”That’s exactly what I did.”

”You don’t have to act so goddamn proud!”

Harry’s face scrunched up in confusion, he tugged at Sirius’s hair. Sirius grimaced, but he didn’t drop the child.

”Sirius, Sirius, who are they? Where are we? Let’s go home, mommy will be worried a lot,” Harry said.

”By Mommy do you mean... Lily?” Lupin asked carefully. Harry’s eyes brightened.

”Uncle Remus! Yea! Lily is Mommy’s name! Who else can Mommy be? Mommy is the best and can’t be anyone else! When I grow up, I wanna be just like Mommy!”

There were a few coughs to stifle laughs.

”Usually it’s ‘I wanna be like Daddy’,” Colonello mumbled. Harry heard him and scowled.

”No! Wanna be like Mommy! Gonna grow my hair long and curse bad guys! And boss Daddy around!” he yelled. Sirius grimaced, his ears ringing as the child shouted. “Wanna be like Mommy! Wanna be like Mommy! Wanna be like Mommy! Sirius! Remus! The pretty blonde man is being silly! I wanna be like Mommy!”

Colonello spluttered and the Acrobaleno roared with laughter. The Order just looked dumbfounded.

”Pretty blonde man?!” Colonello cried indignantly, his manly pride very much hurt. “I’m one hundred percent a man! I’m very manly!”

Lal doubled in laughter as she dropped to her knees, wheezing desperately for breath. “LAL!” Colonello whined. Fon patted Colonello’s arm sympathetically.

”Yes, yes,” he said much like to a child. “You’re very manly.”

Finally, after a while the Acrobaleno calmed down and looked at the mini-Harry.

”So, how long till they switch back?” Reborn questioned.

”The affect lasts for half and hour. So... about 20 minutes left,” Verde answered. However, Harry started crying at that point and everyone grimaced. Where was Mrs. Weasley when you needed her? Then the portrait of Sirius’s mother started screaming too, and it was chaos. Remus took the chance to get out of the room and stop Mrs. Black.

”Sirius! He knows you! Do something!” Tonks cried. Sirius looked alarmed as he did his best to calm the child down, and Skull was getting a headache. He decided to put everyone out of their misery and snatched Harry from Sirius and set him down on the ground.

”Now listen here,” Skull said sternly, “does your Mommy cry like this in front of strangers? Does she wail about wanting to go back because she’s tired? Is that it?”

Harry sobered up immediately, shaking his head and everyone gave a sigh of relief as Mrs. Black shut up too. Hen Harry blinked, looking at Skull in awe.

”You’re Skull-Sama!” he breathed, his eyes shining. Skull blinked. “Mommy took me to one of your shows on my birthday! You were so cool! Your bike went vroom! And the bombs went bang! The helicopter blades went chop, chop, chop! But you avoided all of them! It was awesome!”

Everyone looked at Skull as his personality switched immediately. He laughed loudly, ruffling Harry’s hair.

”Haha! That was one of Skull-Sama’s greatest shows! A once in a life time opportunity! Be honoured, little one!” he said boisterously. Harry nodded with shining eyes. So, Skull, reached behind Harry’s ear dramatically, and then pulled something out with a gasp. “What’s this here?! A magician, are you, little one?”

Harry gasped in awe as he opened the paper handed to him. There, in large, loopy writing, was Skull’s autograph, with a chibi skull in the corner. Harry beamed.

”When I grow up, I’m gonna marry you!” Harry said determinedly. Reborn’s eyes suddenly darkened and he coughed, looking at Skull expectantly. Skull hesitated, but went along with Harry quickly, much to Reborn’s displeasure.

”A great ambition!”

”Mhm! I’m gonna marry a boy just like Mommy!”

At this point, Ginny Weasley suddenly seemed to explode.

”You can’t!” she shrieked and everyone looked at her. Skull groaned internally. His hard work... about to go down the drain in waste... “You can’t marry a... a boy when you grow up! It’s... it’s not right! You’re going to marry me!”

Silence, and Skull wanted to weep and strangle the girl at the same time. What ‘not right’?! What ‘going to marry her’?! This girl was simply asking for a beating, ah! Harry’s lower lip started to tremble and Mr. Weasley glared at his daughter.

”We’re having a talk when we get home,” he hissed. And then the waterworks started from Harry.

The child wailed and screamed and cried “NO! NO! NO! GONNA MARRY SKULL-SAMA! GONNA MARRY A BOY! WANNA BE LIKE MOMMY! NOT GONNA MARRY UGLY LADY!”

And this time, no matter what anyone did, no one could calm the boy down. Of course, it was a little strange how the child suddenly stopped for once second, carefully folded the paper in his hand, put it in his pocket, then began wailing and hitting the floor again. This, of course, made Mrs. Black start up too.

”FILTHY MUDBLOODS! IN MY HOME! MUDBLOOD! FILTH! BLOOD-TRAITORS!”

When Mrs. Black was finally shut up, and Harry disappeared in a puff of sparkles, and their original Harry was back, they were very, very glad. Their world’s Harry looked rather bemused as he took in the haggard sight before him. In one hand he held a cupcake, in his other was a teacup, and around his neck was a lady’s scarf and with the word ‘Lily’ embroidered on it.

He looked at the weary looking Order, the crying Ginny, and his relieved looking friends. He looked at Professor Skull’s friends who were laughing and shaking their heads at the same time, then glanced at Skull himself who was wrapped tightly in Reborn’s arms possessively.

”...did I miss something?” he asked.


	9. Quidditch and homework

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hermione tries to get the boys to do homework. She fails. The boys go to practice Quidditch before the game. They see something rather unexpected at the field...

Breakfast was, splendid, as usual. Though, that could be Harry’s biased opinion after seeing Cho Chang in the morning. Though, the mood did dip a little when the newspaper mentioned Sirius. And then-

“Hey!” Harry said, flattening the paper down so Hermione and Ron could see it. “Look at this!”

“I've got all the robes I want,” said Ron, looking at the paper.  
  
'”No,” said Harry, rolling his eyes. “Look... this little piece here...”  
  
Ron and Hermione bent closer to read it; the item was barely an inch long and placed right at the bottom of a column. It was headlined:  
  
_**TRESPASS AT MINISTRY**_

_Sturgis Podmore, 38, of number two, Laburnum Gardens, Clapham, has appeared in front of the Wizcngamot charged with trespass and attempted robbery at the Ministry of Magic on 31st August. Podmore was arrested by Ministry of Magic watchwizard Eric Munch, who found him attempting to force his way through a top-security door at one o'clock in the morning. Podmore, who refused to speak, in his own defence, was convicted on both charges and sentenced to six months in Azkaban._

”Sturgis Podmore? He's that bloke who looks like his head's been thatched, isn't he? He's one of the Ord-“  
  
”Ron, shh!” hissed Hermione, casting a terrified look around them.  
  
”Six months in Azkaban!” whispered Harry, shocked. ”Just for trying to get through a door!”  
  
”Don't be silly, it wasn't just for trying to get through a door. What on earth was he doing at the Ministry of Magic at one o'clock in the morning?” breathed Hermione.  
  
”D'you reckon he was doing something for the Order?” Ron muttered.  
  
”Wait a moment...” said Harry slowly. “Sturgis was supposed to come and see us off, remember? He was supposed to be part of our guard going to King's Cross, remember? And Moody was all annoyed because he didn't turn up; so he couldn't have been on a job for them, could he?”  
  
”Well, maybe they didn't expect him to get caught,” said Hermione.  
  
”It could be a frame-up!” Ron exclaimed excitedly. ”No- listen! The Ministry suspects he's one of Dumbledore's lot so- I dunno -they lured him to the Ministry, and he wasn't trying to get through a door at all! Maybe they've just made something up to get him!“

“That’s a rather good imagination you’ve got there,” a voice said behind them, and the three whipped around no shock. Verde stood there, his hands in his white lab coat pockets and one eyebrow raised at them. “However, I can tell you that theory is incorrect. That’s all I’m willing to say on that matter, or the others will have my head. And I’m a scientist. I don’t fight. So they have a very high chance of succeeding in killing me. Now, instead of talking about these things, why don’t you get on with your homework? Good job on your essay, by the way Miss Granger. Good day.”

The trio watched him with open mouths as he disappeared through the doors. Strangely, no one seemed to have noticed their little conversation. Hermione seemed to come out of a reverie as the doors slammed shut.  
  
“Right, well, I think Professor Verde is right. We should tackle that essay for Sprout on self-fertilising shrubs first and if we're lucky we'll be able to start McGonagall's Inanimatus Conjurus Spell before lunch...”

_ **SOME TIME LATER....** _

Harry felt a small twinge of guilt at the thought of the pile of homework awaiting him upstairs, and of Hermione expectantly waiting for them at the library... Bur the sky was a clear, exhilarating blue, and he had not been on his Firebolt for a week...  
  
“I mean, we can do it tonight,. said Ron, as he and Harry walked down the sloping lawns towards the Quidditch pitch, their broomsticks over their shoulders, and with Hermione's dire warnings that they would fail all their OWLs still ringing in their ears. “And we've got tomorrow. She gets too worked up about work, that's her trouble.” There was a pause and he added, in a slightly more anxious tone, “Do you think she meant it when she said we weren't copying from her?”  
  
“Yeah, I do,” said Harry grimly. “Still, this is important, too, we've got to practise if we want to stay on the Quidditch team...”  
  
“Yeah, that's right,” said Ron, in a heartened tone. And we have got plenty of time to do it all... bloody hell, wait a second, is that Reborn? What’s he doing in the middle of Quidditch field?”

Harry craned his neck and blinked. Indeed, true to Ron’s words, Reborn was on the middle of the field, looking up at the blue sky with a slight frown on his face. Then the man glanced at the hearing boys and nodded a greeting.

”Morning,” Reborn greeted amiably.

”Ah, morning sir,” Harry and Ron mumbled. “Uh... what are you doing here?”

”Waiting for Skull,” Reborn said irritably. “He said he’d be here ten minutes ago. He left to find a broom... apparently.”

”The Great Skull-Sama is here!” a voice bellowed and a purple blur whizzed to a stop in front of them. Harry and Ron gaped at the immense speed the broom had given. Skull winked at the boys. “Heya, like my ride?”

”That-!” Ron said, his voice oddly high. “That’s a Firebolt 2.0! They’re limited edition! Only three were ever made! How did you-?!”

”I have my ways,” Skull said, laughing. Reborn rolled his eyes.

”I remember picking that broom up at a target’s house, Skull. And I remember quite well you shrieking loudly and begging for the goddamn thing when you saw it,” he said dryly. Skull flushed red, but grinned nonetheless.

”Aw, but you gave it to me anyway, right? Even though you hated me back then-“

Reborn coughed faintly, and muttered string under his breath which sounded a lot like “I didn’t hate you.”

”Um, Professor, but what are you doing out here...?” Harry asked and Skull rolled his eyes at him.

”Mr. Overprotective here,” he said, jerking his head towards Reborn, who scowled, “didn’t want me on my motorbike doing stunts. He said they were too dangerous and I was going to get killed going through a minefield on it one day-” Harry choked, bug Skull didn’t seem to notice and continued talking. “So I decided to show him something really shocking.”

”One stunt only,” Reborn said warningly. “Then if I deem that stunt less dangerous than on a motorbike, you’re not doing anymore stunts.”

”Yea Yea,” Skull mumbled, then grinned at the three of them. “Watch and learn then.”

And suddenly Skull was gone, the three craned their necks to watch as Skull shot into the sky, doing a few loops and whooping loudly. Reborn flinched in worry as Skull went above cloud level and hovered there.

”What’s he doing...?” Harry muttered, and Ron shrugged helplessly.

The tiny speck that was Skull suddenly leaned over and Reborn cursed loudly, his eyes wide. The two students also gave a cry of shock as Skull fell towards the earth- _without his broom._

_”Skull!” _Reborn cried in shock.

As Skull fell to the ground, laughing like a maniac, his broom followed at a lighting pace- but it didn’t seem fast enough to catch up. Harry realised dimly the broom must be enchanted to follow after the purple man, but that thought was soon pushed to the back of his head as Skull was less than 10 metres from the ground.

”He’s gonna die!” Ron moaned. And then-

Just a foot above the ground Skull caught his broom and swung his body onto the slim body. The. He was up and snoring away again and the three let out a collective breath of relief.

It was when Skull landed that Reborn grabbed his lover and grasped him into a tight hug.

”Ok-“ he said in a shaky breath. “Ok, I won’t say anything about you riding over a minefield. At least then I have a chance of healing you- just _don’t do that again_.”

Skull looked rather smug.


	10. Umbridge is in deep sh*t

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The inspections, detentions, Skull and Umbridge.

The morning after their chat with Sirius and the letter from Percy was... interesting, to say the least. And very concerning. The Daily Prophet had just arrived when, and Hermione had just glanced at it when from the teacher’s table there was a loud ‘WHAT?!’

Everyone looked over in alarm at the furious looking Skull, who glared at a rather frightened looking Dolores Umbridge. Skull was breathing heavily, and Reborn was sipping peacefully at his coffee. He looked rather undisturbed. Verde was nowhere to be seen. But back to Skull.

”You dare?!” he yelled, and the entirety of the Hall was silent now. “YOU _DARE_ SAY SOMETHING SO... SO...”

”Detestable?” Reborn suggested. “Disgusting? Antagonising?”

”SO GODDAMN **[THIS BIT HAS HAD TO BE CENSORED FOR FEAR OF YOUR HEALTH] **YOUFILTHY, UGLY LITTLE **[&*#&@&#*$&@$(@*%*@*] **YOU DISGUSTING WOMAN! NO SHAME! NO SHAME AT ALL YOU-“

”Skull,” Reborn interrupted. “There are children.”

Skull faltered, then nodded, taking deep breath. Then he glared at the stunned looking pink toad. He gave snarl that rivalled that of a wolf.

”If I catch you saying something like that again,” he hissed, “be warned, there will be nothing stopping me from _murdering_ you.”

Then the purple teacher got up, and stormed off in a blaze of fury. Reborn stood up and went after him, most likely to placate his lover.

The golden trio glanced at each other.

”That was... unexpected,” Harry said at last.

“You’re telling me, mate,” Ron muttered.

_ **INSPECTIONS...** _

Skull decided he wouldn’t take Umbridge sitting down. He decided to look into Umbridge’s inspections. Just to give her a bit of pressure and give the other teachers a little... Eh, support. After all, he was still fuming about what she’d said.

”’_Disgusting muggles should stay out of our way and let more capable, _actual_ people do their jobs’ _she said,” Skull muttered angrily as he stalked through the hallways. “Hah! Reborn is a hundred times better than _her_! Did _she_ train Vongola’s tenth generation? Did _she_ train a bunch of cry baby wizards? Did _she_ get turned into a baby with her Dying Will slowly being drained?! No? Didn’t think so!”

Reborn looked amused, yet pleased at Skull’s ranting. He patted Skull’s purple head.

”She’s just too narrow minded, Bellissimo,” he purred. “Take no notice of her.”

Skull turned his disbelieving gaze on Reborn.

”She insulted _you_!” he screeched, stopping walking and whirling around to face Reborn. “_How_ the _hell_ are you so calm about this?!”

Reborn smirked, kissing Skull’s nose lightly, then bypassing him. Skull blinked, then quickly ran to catch up with the hitman. Skull’s cheeks were dusted a light pink, which was a very good look on Skull, Reborn decided. Like all other looks.

”Well,” Reborn drawled. “One: I think you’re angry enough for both of us. Two: there’s always a chance to kill her later. And three: she’s not worth it.”

Skull blinked, then sighed, taking a deep breath. He nodded after a while, smiling gently. Reborn smiled, kissing Skull’s temple.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right, Ren.”

”There we go~ While you being angry for me is rather hot, I’d rather you smile for me instead,” Reborn said, winking. Skull flushed red, grunting.

”Sh-shut up... come on. This is McGonagall’s classroom. Umbitch should be here at the moment,” Skull said.

It was insanely satisfying to see Umbridge put in her place. For the rest of the day, Skull and Reborn followed Umbridge around for her inspections. They intervened when things got out of control, Umbridge tried to do something annoying and Harry spoke up for his friends. And just like that, the day was over soon. Skull found it very nice to see a toad who thought itself as a dragon put down. Then Skull, as he and Reborn went to bed, remembered something about Hogwarts he’d forgotten about.

It was near 11:30 when Skull woke up Reborn. The hitman was alert in an instant.

”Is something wrong?” he asked quietly. Skull shook his head giddily.

”No, everything’s fine, Ren. Just, come, come. I need to show you something,” he said, dragging Reborn out of bed.

They walked down the dark hallways, Skull dragging Reborn by the hand. The stuntman only wore black pyjama bottoms and one of Reborn’s yellow shirt that hung off his slim frame beautifully- Reborn shook the thought out of his head. He himself wore a black tank top and gold trimmed track pants. As the two trailed up a few stairs, not expecting anyone to be up at this hour-

“Harry? What are you doing out here?” Skull asked, faltering in his steps. The Potter flinched, hiding his hand behind his back automatically. The boy tried for a smile.

”I- ah, had detention with Um- I mean Professor Umbridge,” he said. Skull looked him up and down.

”...I smell blood,” Reborn said, staring intently at Harry. Harry flinched, and there was a soft plip, plip, plip...

Skull and Reborn’s eyes trailed to the floor below Harry. A dark red liquid dripped to the floor in steady drops. Skull was in front of Harry in an instant. He grabbed the boy’s hand and yanked it into view. Reborn and Skull’s pupils constricted, their eyes narrowing. One the back of the child’s hand was _‘I must not tell lies_’ carved into his flesh.

”...Umbitch?” Skull asked quietly, Harry startled.

”Um... oh. Yes. Umbridge.”

Skull’s lips pursed together and he looked Harry in the eyes.

”What you’re about to see... don’t tell anyone, understood?” he asked quietly, his voice deadly. Harry nodded, mentally telling himself not to tell even Hermione or Ron. The way Skull looked currently... Reborn took Harry’s hand and there was a flicker of yellow in the hitman’s eyes.

Harry watched with wide eyes as warm, but not hot, yellow flames washed over his wounds, sealing them up quickly. Skull nodded, and cleaned the blood up with a wave of his hand. “...go back. Go to sleep,” Skull said quietly. “We’ll deal with her.”

Harry hesitated, and then nodded, practically running to back to the common room. As his back faded from their sights, Skull sneered, his eyes dark and flickering with purple. “Heh,” he said, “looks like she’s still using it.”

”So, I’m guessing we’re not going to be seeing whatever it was tonight?” Reborn asked coolly. Skull nodded apologetically.

”We’ll go tomorrow night. But for now, we need some sleep. We have to have our energy to go against Umbridge. While she may be weak, I want to push her down to the very bottom of the pit of despair, and then some more.”

Reborn almost purred as he nibbled Skull’s ear.

”As you wish, Bellissimo~”


	11. Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skull goes to beat Umbridge up. Reborn watches. Hermione talks, the three ex-Acrobaleno listen.

The next morning, Skull got ready. He turned his hair back into its original black and put on absolutely no make up, or piercings, or bandaids. He wore a purple shirt and torn black jeans. His tidied his hair; slicking it back with gel. Reborn whistled from where he watched.

“You look stunning and scary,” he said. “Death kind of scary.”

Skull gave him a tight smile and said, “That’s what I was going for.” His eyes flashed. “It’s breakfast now. Let’s go put in a show.” He pulled out his wand and Oodako latched onto his arm. The octopus had on his breather, somehow managed to look just as menacing as his cloudy partner.

Reborn nodded and got up from his seat, the brim of his fedora cast deep shadows over his eyes. Together, the two looked like dark angels that’d fallen from Heaven- only to flourish further than before in Hell.

_ **POV SWITCH...** _

Harry hadn’t been sure what exactly Skull and Reborn had been planning; but he sure as hell didn’t expect _this_.

Skull came bursting into the hall, his eyes ablaze with fury and looking like the definition of a fallen angel. Then Harry saw Reborn and corrected himself. Hell was empty, and the Devil and its beloved had come to shake the earth. Harry glanced at Verde, who looked like he wasn’t surprised in the slightest at this development.

”You fucking bitch!” Skull roared and everyone flinched. Who was he talking to...? That question was soon answered. “Dolores Umbridge! I’m talking to you, you vile shit load!”

The stuntman stormed over to the pink toad who squealed like a pig and pushed her chair away from the table as Skull came everywhere closer. She tried to draw herself up.

”H-how dare you! I will have you thrown out of this school! Y-you! Take him-”

Skull grabbed the front of her dress and tossed her to the ground. How Skull managed to heave the fat lump off, Harry wasn’t very sure. But his eyes stayed glued to the scene.

”I see you’re still trying to take control over what not yours, _hmm_, Dolores?” Skull snarled. “Even back in school you were an utter bitch of a pink toad- ah, wait a minute, calling you a toad would be an insult to the toads around in the world, wouldn’t it?”

Harry looked at Reborn, who’d slid into the seat next to Verde. Reborn looked amused, while Verde looked rather interested as to how this would play out. He’d even stopped scribbling in his notebook and was paying rapt attention. Harry looked back at Skull, who’d whipped out his wand and pointed it towards Umbridge, who quivered in fear. Skull sneered.

”Blood Quills? Really?” he asked, eerily quiet. There was a sharp intake of breath. “You know those are illegal, Dolores. They have been since the end of the Middle Ages. You should’ve learnt that a long time ago. You should’ve stopped after _that time_.”

Umbridge quivered, her gaze frightened.

”Wh-who are you?!” she asked shrilly. Skull tilted his head to the side. His gaze was sinister and his wand didn’t waver in the slightest.

”Ne, Dolores. Was the lesson in your sixth year not enough to drill it into your thick head?”

Skull took a step closer and the students of Hogwarts all held their breath as one. “Well then... I wonder what will happen, if I tell the Minister of your actions?”

_ **SOME TIME** **LATER...** _

Umbridge was still in the school, though she was obviously very frightened. Skull had dragged her along somewhere private, though no one was sure what had happened. Several had guesses. It appeared Umbridge, in a rare moment of genius, had managed to gather her wits and realised who Skull was. Then she’d blackmailed him. Skull had been furious, but agreed to keep quiet- but she’d have to stop using the quills and keep her head down for the most part. He unfortunately could not do anything about her teaching curriculum.

”You did your best,” Reborn said soothingly as Skull paced around furiously. “So now it’s my turn. Let me kill her.”

Skull took a deep breath, his mind wavering, then he shook his head. Verde raised an eyebrow.

”It’s clear you hate her, so why not?” the scientist asked.

”Suspicion,” Skull sighed, slumping into a chair. “As much as I’d love to, she’s too high up. If she suddenly goes missing on Hogwarts ground, what do you think will happen?”

”Hogwarts will get blamed,” Reborn said grimlyl

”Exactly.”

”...both of you shut up. I can hear something,” Verde said. The three fell silent as footsteps were heard outside the classroom.

”Are you _nuts _Hermione!? They’re teachers!” Ron’s voice hissed.

”But unlike most teachers, they listen,” Hermione’s voice grumbled back. “Harry said yes, right Harry?”

”Yep.”

”And all we need know is a place to actually hold the meetings. It’s clear Professor Skull has been around here, and knows his way. So maybe he’ll know of a place. Or at least, maybe Professor Verde will let us use one of his classrooms.”

Reborn swing open the door and the Golden Trio helped in shock. Skull peered at them, grinning.

”So,” he drawled, “tell me what’s going on first, and I might just have the place you need.”

_ **A BIT LATER...** _

”Brilliant!” Skull cackled. “Why didn’t I think of that?! A plan to teach the other students actual DADA- genius! I know just the place! Follow me you lot!”

He strode out the classroom, the others chasing after him quickly.

”I found this place when I was in my.... hm, fourth year, I think? I was looking for some place I could hide for a while, and ta-da! I was going to show Ren last night, but we ran into Harry and that plan got pushed back. It’s... somewhere... here!”

Skull turned to his audience. “This place is the Room of Requirements. It gives you anything you need. The way to get in is walk here three times across from Barnabas the Barmy, while thinking of what kind of room you need. And... ha!”

A door appeared and Skull winked at the stunned people. He opened it. “I was thinking of a stunt area so... yea. Well? Think it’s appropriate?”

The Golden Trio stared at Skull, then nodded dumbly. Skull grinned.

”Now, all we have to do is gather the members.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the (very) late update! I know, my updates keep getting longer in between...  
But I swear I have a valid excuse: school.  
Homework, reviewing, tests, life- that and my house is to be renovated and blah, blah, blah. So yea. Life, in general.


	12. Meetings at the Hogshead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh no....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the unexpected pause... I got swept up and lost down the path of life again...

Reborn and Skull watched silently as the students trickled in. The two of them had taken extra precautions and kicked out everyone, and when the owner had complained they’d given him a bag of galleons. That’d shut him up. That and Reborn’s glowing yellow eyes.

Skull noted that there wasn’t one Slytherin amongst the kids which was... reasonable, he supposed. They watched as Harry grew visibly uncomfortable at the ever-growing crowd of people. He watched as Harry whispered something to Hermione, who answered back quickly. A chubby boy, Neville, Skull remembered, greeted the Trio and sat down. Skull tried to muffle his snort of amusement at Harry’s blatant crush on the Chinese girl. Cho Chang, was it? Reborn too, looked rather amused.

After a while, and the door to the Hogshead had been locked, the curtains drawn and a green ‘We Are Closed’ sign hung on the door, (bless Leon), silence hung through the room. Reborn gave a sharp glare at the bartender, who hurriedly plugged his ears and stayed within Reborn’s sight. (Never let a potential enemy out of your sight. A very important rule in Reborn’s opinion). All eyes were dead set on Harry.

Hermione coughed and stood up, her posture stiff and full of awkwardness. “Well,” she said, “Well, we, um, hi.” The eyes turned to her, bit occasionally looked back at Harry. Hermione coughed again.

”Well... erm... well, you know why you're here. Uh... well, Harry here had the idea- I mean-” (Harry had thrown her a sharp look) _“I _had the idea- that it might be good if people who wanted to study Defence Against the Dark Arts- and I mean, really study it, you know, not the rubbish that Umbridge is doing with us-” (Hermione's voice became suddenly much stronger and more confident and Skull had to bite down a laugh at her obvious disgust of the woman) “-because nobody could call that Defence Against the Dark Arts-“ (“Hear, hear!” said Anthony Goldstein, and Hermione looked rather pleased) “-Well, I thought it would be good if we, well, took matters into our own hands.”

Not the best speech, but Skull gave her points for trying and effort.

Hermione paused, looked sideways at Harry and went on, “And when I say, that I mean learning how to defend ourselves _properly_, not just in theory but doing the _real_ spells-”  
  
“You want to pass your Defence Against the Dark Arts OWL too, though, I bet?” said Michael Corner, who was watching her closely.  
  
“Of course I do,” said Hermione snapped back, then took a breath and softened her voice. “But more than that, I want to be properly trained in defence because... because...” she took a great breath and finished, “because _Lord Voldemort_ is back.”

There was chaos at the name. Out of the corner of his eye, Skull saw Reborn sit up, a new glint in his obsidian eyes. The bartender still looked wary of the hitman though and didn’t unplug his ears.

“Well... that's the plan, anyway,” said Hermione. “If you want to join us, we need to decide how we're going to-”  
  
“Where's the proof You-Know-Who's back?” said a blond Hufflepuff player in a rather aggressive voice. Skull frowned, disliking this boy immediately.  
  
“Well, Dumbledore believes it-” Hermione began to say and Skull sighed. Not the best way to start. Almost half the people in here thought the man was a lunatic.  
  
“You mean, Dumbledore believes him,” said the blond boy, nodding at Harry and Skull found himself disliking the boy _very_ much.  
  
“Who are you anyway?” said Ron abruptly.  
  
“Zacharias Smith. And I think we've got the right to know exactly what makes him say You-Know-Who's back.” Things were not going as well as Skull had hoped.  
  
“Look,” said Hermione, “that's really not what this meeting was supposed to be about...”  
  
“It's OK, Hermione,” said Harry, speaking up at last.  
  
“What makes me say You-Know-Who's back?” he repeated, looking Zacharias straight in the eyes. “I saw him. But Dumbledore told the whole school what happened last year, and if you didn't believe him, you won't believe me, and I'm not wasting an afternoon trying to convince anyone.”

“All Dumbledore told us last year was something about You-Know-Who and that you and Diggory barely made it back alive or something. He didn't give us details, he didn't tell us exactly how you guys got to see You-Know-Who up close and personal- if you even did. I think we'd all like to know-”  
  
“If you've come to hear exactly what it looks like when Voldemort tries to kill you and your friend, I can't help you,” Harry said, surprisingly calmly. “I don't want to talk about the Tournament, all right? So if that's what you're here for, you might as well clear out now. Well?”

There was silence, and Reborn his a smile. That was more like it. A sky with a secondary lightning flame. The sky that had been dulled, but still had the potential to shine. Hermione spoke again and Skull tuned out, thinking. He only tuned back in when the Weasley twins pulled out a strange looking metal device, and then tuned back out.

His head full of cluttered thoughts only cleared out when the students all began to sit a parchment and began to leave slowly. After they were all gone, Reborn clapped his hands and the Trio startled, looking at him in alarm.

”And that,” Reborn announced, “shows just how much they need training. If they can’t spot two people who are obviously not students, one of them wearing clothes like a flower and the other with a pet chameleon, then I really can’t find any hope for them. But I am a rather good teacher, so it’ll be up to me to beat the message into them.”

The Trio looked horrified, and Skull laughed out loud loudly.


	13. Of clubs and first lessons [Part One]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Read the chapter title pls.

Skull was furious. In fact, he was livid. He was so mad that he wanted to _rage_. But no, he couldn’t do that. This was Hogwarts, where he’d grown up and had made so many memories. He couldn’t do anything that could hurt this place, especially not rage. Verde sighed, looking up from his book.

”Your pacing is grating on my nerves. Stop it,” he ordered.

”But she’s an absolute _bitch_!” Skull complained. “Look at it. Look at it!” He waved his hand towards the plaque hung up on the wall. Verde sighed, and indulged him by looking.

**BY ORDER OF THE HIGH INQUISITOR OF HOGWARTS**

_All student organisations, societies, teams, groups and clubs are henceforth disbanded._

_An organisation, society, team, group or club is hereby defined as a regular meeting of three or more students._

_Permission to re-form may be sought from the High Inquisitor (Professor Umbridge)._

_No student organisation, society, team, group or club may exist without the knowledge and approval of the High Inquisitor. Any student found to have formed, or to belong to, an organisation, society, team, group or club that has not been approved by the High Inquisitor will be expelled._   
_The above is in accordance with Educational Decree Number Twenty-four._

**Signed: Dolores Jane Umbridge, High Inquisitor.**

Verde looked at him, a eyebrow raised, and he asked: “I suppose this tantrum of yours has to do with the little ‘club’ you and Reborn have decided to ‘sponsor’?”

“Mhm,” Skull said glumly, his mood downcast. Then he brightened. “Well, it won’t really affect us, I guess. She doesn’t know we exist, so we don’t have to do anything! Ha! Take that!”

”Professor!”

Skull blinked, looking around, and saw Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley racing towards him.

”Ah, hello you two! Though, I’m not really a professor here anymore. I mean, I am the assistant DADA teacher but, well, you know. Or maybe you meant Verde,” Skull said, shrugging. “Anyway, is there something we can do for you?”

”Uh, yes, there is, actually, um,” Harry said, suddenly looking very awkward. “Well, I- we -were wondering if you could do us a little favour...”

”Hmm? I’m listening,” Skull said, smiling. Then he looked at Verde. “Ah, you can go ahead, I only wanted to complain a little.”

Verde looked at the purple haired adrenaline junkie suspiciously, then shrugged and began to walk away. “I’ll tell Reborn where you are,” he said carelessly.

Skull beamed, nodding, “Ok! Thanks Verde!”

Verde let out a long, suffering sigh, and vanished around the corner. Skull turned back to look at the two boys. “Now, you were saying?”

”Well, um, you know how Umbridge... the clubs...” Harry said slowly, and Skull nodded, a frown lacing his features. “Well, this means we have to reform the Quidditch team, and you know how Umbridge is with me...”

”Indeed,” Skull said.

”So, well, we’re a bit afraid she might do something, uh, biased, when our Captain, Angelina Johnson, goes to ask...”

”You want me to accompany her?” Skull guessed and Harry and Ron gave a nod. “Say no more! I’ll be glad to help out. When’s your captain asking?”

”Today, she’s just around the corner. We told her to wait so... you know, we could ask you,” Ron said quickly. “Angelina! It’s cool! He said yes!” he bellowed, turning around.

A girl peeked around the corner, her features full of relief as she walked up. She said to Skull, “Thank you so much. I didn’t know if-”

“Hey, it’s cool,” Skull said, grinning. “I’m on your side. Anything to help fellows in need. Let’s go bother the bitch now.”

_ **SOME TIME LATER (a few days, hours, minutes... who knows...?**_

Skull was happy. Very, very, happy. The look on Umbridge’s face had been priceless! Even though that had been a while ago, he was still in a very good mood. Skull would pay good money to see it again her ugly face contort again. He let out a bark of laughter and managed to frighten several students. He merely gave them a large smile and they smiled back hesitantly, before scurrying away like frightened mice.

He stretched, his shirt riding up and revealing his toned stomach for a second, before he dropped his arms back to his side.

”Now then, wasn’t the first meeting today?” he wondered. “Ooh, lets go get Ren and give those little munchkins a surprise. Ha!”

  
_ **REBORN POV...** _

Reborn, safe to say, loved his partner. And if his partner loved Chaos as well? Well, even better! So when Skull suggested crashing the ‘party’, Reborn was all out for it. Besides, it would be amusing to see the kids reactions to a ‘teacher’ stumbling upon them as they practised things not in the curriculum set by the pink toad. Reborn looked fondly towards his partner.

Yes. He loved the Cloud known as Skull de Mort.


	14. Note. Please read, everyone.

To the Readers,

Hi guys, unfortunately, this is not an update. Sorry. Really sorry.

OK, so, how do I put this...? I'll just say it.

Guys, I'm really sorry but this story will be going on hiatus for an indefinite amount of time. For the moment, I've just kind of... lost inspiration, I guess you could say. I really am sorry about this. I hate hiatuses personally a lot, and I never wanted to do this, but I guess it's inevitable sometimes. Once again, I really am sorry.

So, am I ever going to come back to it? Yes, yes I am. At the most, this story will only be on pause for a year. Just until I've got a grip on my life. It's not that things are going badly though, it's just that lately, I've been feeling really tired and out of motivation. I've also started quite a few stories on other profiles like the irresponsible fool I am, so it's just really hectic. Adding to that, is COVID-19. It's not much of an excuse, I know, but it's just a whole lot of negative feelings piling up inside me; and I don't know how to get rid of it.

For the moment, I'm going to be concentrating on one story. The story is 'The Blades in Your Heart (that we've never noticed), on this site.

So I really am sorry to all my readers. You don't have to forgive me, or continue to keep an eye on this story, but I will be back on this- that I can promise. So again, sorry, and thank you for your understanding.

From your author, BloodBornOleander.


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